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Spirituality

 Sometimes when the mind reaches a state where the inside and the outside become one There is no beginning or end Its like infinity contained in a dot The connection between the internal and external universe seems to be through the third eye Everything exists and yet does not exist It is like a flow of energy, a lightening  And there is nothingness to it The external universe is encompassed in the internal body And what is internal and what is external is itself debatable There is powerful energy flowing though the energy through the body though not restricted by it what you can see is waves and waves of energy concentrating asymptotically to a focal point Its euphoric its beautiful  Its a state that you want to remain forever Yet its scary because you feel like losing yourself or at least what you think you are Definitions become blur , physicality becomes blur, who you are becomes blur And the fear of unknown takes over

From where you come

 Not a revelation if I tell you from where you come shapes you. What I realized is that the quest for who am I starts after the basic needs are satisfied... for eg: for a child in a first world nation it starts from birth and encouragement from parents, for smart but poig student in a third world country it starts with getting through a premiere engineering school with a security of a job but for most of the world, the basic needs are so overpowering that it needs a lot of strength of character to go into the search of who am i

Sleeping woes

 One of the main issues during this treatment has been sleeping Things that have helped me - Mindfulness Forgiveness ( especially one self) Gratefulness Happiness comes from within ( I have tried too hard to please people who will only find faults in me) Acceptance

Fighting Cancer From Within

Life changes when they say you have luekemia. I am 2 months into treatment and am hoping to beat it soon. With a 15 month in tow its not easy. I cant be near him most of the time for fear of infection. Thank god my parents were visiting and are here for help. On most days I am functioning as a normal human being. Today is a good day. My body is healing. I can sit straight again. Last three days were not. I was having terrible headache that started from my neck all the way to my head so that i could not move my head! I had to lie in the bed the entire day. So I sure appreciate the joy of being able to sit, to walk...something I had taken for granted all through my life:) But life is good today. I do not have any treatment for the next three days. I have an intrathecal again on Tuesday. I am keeping my fingers crossed. If there is cerebrospinal fluid leak again, i will have an headache:( Here is a poem dedicated to life   The shining sun signalling the birth of new day   ...